People that get on my nerves Pt.1

Oh the life of singledom. Don't get me wrong I am content in my single life and don't often whine complain about not being in a relationship. I've browsed a few of the dating 'networking' sites and have been having a grand ole time laughing at some of the profiles and seeing why some of these fellas don't have dates. I've also gone on a few dates and some them have made this blog, some of this stuff is just people that annoy me..

Whiners and Criers

Seriously, if you're whining and crying in your profile about how you're such a great catch and how women just don't get you, yada yada yada, that's probably not the right or smart way to get someone to give a damn about you send you a connection email or a 'wink'. Man up punk and stop whining and crying. At least fake the funk,(I have Brad Paisley's song Online in mind) it is online and you can be who you want to be, or should I commend you for just putting it right out there that you're a whiny punk. I'm not a fan of whiners and criers in general either so it's not limited to just online profile reading. I can only take so much especially if I KNOW that someone created the problem that they're now whining about, they gets NO LOVE from the kid. I'll tell someone to Man or Wo(man) up in a heart beat!! Don't believe me, come around me whining about some BS, i'll show you..

Never give up'ers

Guy: Will you go out with me?
Girl: No
Guy: Come on, go out with me?
Girl: No thanks.
Guy: You'll have fun, I promise!
Girl: Punk, didn't you just hear me say NO?

Please, please, please! I've said no, leave me alone! If you think I'm missing out on something, then guess what?!? It's my own damned fault! More than likely I'm not missing out on anything since you feel like you have to beg in the first place.

You Owe Me an Explanation'ers

Guy: Will you go out with me?
Girl: No
Guy: Why?
Girl: Because I don't want to.
Guy: But why? Am I unattractive, does my breath smell, am I too short? What is it?
Girl: Yes, all of the above. You're ugly, your breath smells like ass, and you're so short you'd get mistaken for my little brother that I don't have. So, let's recap. You're an ASS!!!

If you ask me out and I say no, I don't owe you an explanation. I don't owe you jack! Just take your rejection like a man and keep it movin'. Does categorizing your rejection make it any less of a rejection? I don't think so. I'll tell you this. The few times I've approached a man, if he said no, you did not see me standing around asking why. For one, rejection doesn't feel too good. With me, it kinda stings, so I need to go nurse my wounds...somewhere ELSE. Two, I don't need to know why! I don't want to know why, it might make me want to go jump off a sidewalk and hurt myself or something. Three, the person that rejected me might actually feel bad about it and they want my ass to go somewhere else too! So go! Git!

Loud Talkers

Shut the hell up! Why must you be so LOUD? I used to know someone that was so loud on the phone I had to hold the phone away from my ear while they were talking. They were so loud in public that people would tell them to shhhh!! Can some people no hear themselves and moderate their tone. Use your insdie voice! You're at a 10 and I need you at a 4..Then there are those people that stand outside my office and have loud conversations. Shut the hell up! Don't nobody wanna hear all your boring business! I'm trying to work but can't concentrate for hearing your voice droning on and on loudly. And it just so happens that on the days that I do wanna hear their business, those chumps are whispering. Go figure!

Bill Collectors 'ers

Sometimes, you nasty collection people (I tried to type that with as much venom as possible, but I don't think it carried), you really do have the WRONG number.

Nasty Collection Person 1: Hello, May I speak with Debra Smith?
Me: You have the wrong number.
Nasty Collection Person 1: This isn't 225-555-7289?
Me: Yes, it is, but my name isn't Debra Smith and no one by that name lives here
Nasty Collection Person 1: Ok, thank you.

Me: Hello?
Nasy Collection Person: Mrs. Smith, this is Nancy from Bill Collection America and I need to speak with you in regards to a debt you owe to We Know You Can't Really Afford This Crap But We'll Loan You The Money Anyway Credit Company.
Me: Didn't you just call 5 minutes ago? I told you that you had the wrong number.
Nasty Collection Person 1: Ms. Smith, you really need to talk to me. If you don't, I'll be forced to...
Me: Damn you lady, my name ain't nowhere near Debra or Smith. Quit calling me.

The next day when I got home from work, there were 3 messages from Nasty Collection Persons 2, & 3 on my voicemail. One even began his message with, "Hey Deb! This is Roger, give me a call back, k? 1-800..." like he and Deb shoot marbles and and just that cool! ha ha ha The next one he left basically told Debra that she was only making her life more difficult by avoiding him. Poor Deb sounds like she's in a whirl of financial trouble.

I'm Looking For a Women 'ers

Irregular Plurals. Here, cut these out and make yourself some flash cards.

Oh. My. Jesus. These dudes are KILLING me with that crap. It's woman!! W-O-M-A-N!! You're looking for a woman, not a women.

Woman is singular. Women is plural.

A womAn:

Some womEn:

Either you're looking for one WOMAN or you're looking for several WOMEN, and in that case you'd be looking for more than one WOMAN. You'll never, ever, ever be looking for a WOMEN. Ok? Please say ok. Ya'll are killing me. It's an epidemic. I find myself strolling through profiles gritting my teeth, restraining myself from sending nasty e-mails screaming, "THERE'S NO SUCH THING AS A WOMEN!!!!" If you have, "I'm looking for a women...", Or "I'm interested in woman..." on your profile, go correct that mess RIGHT now. For real. Close this blog, and go edit your profile. You ain't even gotta leave me a cnnment just go, quickly. If you need help, I'll help you, but so help me God, if you're on my friends list and I find out you've got that mess on a profile on your page, this woman is gonna delete you. I'm not playin'!! Yep, it's that crucial.

I'm sure I could go on and on about other people that annoy me and get on my nervers but today that's that made the cut. What kinda people get on your nerves?

Brown..out!